Signs that your parent is having trouble taking care of basic things are below:
+ Reducing their showering frequency because they are afraid of falling.
+ Keeping up with their nutrition requirements and they are losing weight.
+ They have just had a major surgery and are recovering.
+ Their memory is spotty and you discover that they are not keeping themselves as clean as they should after using the toilet.
+ They fell and bruised themselves or scraped their arms or leg and now you have a wound that needs to be kept clean and infection free; because you know enough to have seen that a wound can turn into cellulitis under the skin infection – which will then require a prescription for antibiotics. And the antibiotics cause diarrhea which then complicates the hygiene challenges.
+ You see them getting weaker and having difficulty getting up from a chair, and the doctor says it’s “old age” rather than attempting to treat their weakening condition.
You feel very concerned for their well-being and you want the very best for them.
You know you need a new level of help.
Who do you trust to assist?
The “At Home caregiving assistants” are one option, but you know or have seen other family members who have had experience with these workers doing other unrelated work while you are paying them to watch and look after your parent.
For example, the woman who hired a caregiver who she trusted and then found out that the caregiver was doing the bookkeeping work of her husband’s business, while the caregiver was supposed to be cleaning and helping the parent with exercising, and cooking for the parent.
And the woman who called the State to go and look into the practices of a “top quality” nursing home where her mom was being mistreated, and the staff got wind of when the State inspectors were coming, so they could “tidy things up” for the State inspectors expected arrival.
You talk to a lawyer because you need a Power of Attorney, and then you see that the lawyer has a shift in their respect that is like a Shark smelling blood in the water.
They know your personal business and they are supposed to be an Officer of the Court and have taken a sworn Oath of service, but they ask you about your parent’s finances and you know they are sizing you up as to know whether they may have to step in and become your parent’s Trustee, Conservator or Guardian if you don’t devote the adequate time and skill to caring for your parent.
The Hollywood Movie “What They Had” with Academy Award winner and real-life caregiver to her father, Hillary Swank, with co-stars Blythe Danner, Michael Shannon and Robert Forster, is a heart touching “comedy” about caring for a Midwest parent with Alzheimer’s.
The movie is ground-breaking and is a step in the right direction even though it scratches the surface of what families face practically and legally when encountering the many aspects of the Medicare services sector that feeds into the legal “system”.
For thousands of years and in countries across the world, the elderly have been more easily stripped of their property.
The Bible as a historical reference warns against this common practice, Mark 12:40, “Yet they shamelessly cheat widows out of their property and then pretend to be pious by making long prayers in public. Because of this, they will be more severely punished.”
Well known celebrities such as TV Star Peter Falk of the hit Prime Time show “Colombo” have been victims of a vicious system that can be defeated with sunlight.
Songwriter and singer Glen Campbell’s son Travis Campbell is working to change the laws that presently favor guardians over families.
Film star Mickey Rooney’s daughter Kerry Rooney-Mack has been an advocate for families against the abusive guardians that are the most common set of circumstances in these situations of Probate court channeled elder abuse.
Forward-thinking professionals like Dr. Sam Sugar of the AAAPG, Americans Against Abusive Probate Guardianship, and Elaine Renoire, NASGA, National Association to Stop Guardianship Abuse https://stopguardianabuse.org, have eye-opening stories to tell about shining the powerful spotlight on the gritty reality of the ugly fight that occurs around elders and the property grabbing that is driving the agenda of so many elder system professionals “on the take”.
Attorney Ron Denman spoke passionately at the AAAPG conference in Tampa, Florida about having his own wake-up call as a lawyer as to his professional journey from where – until fairly recently, he had no idea what was going on in the Probate courts.
Ron Denman speaks at 16:11 in the video. He calls what happened in the Court in front of the judge as “The Twilight Zone”.
His naivete as a highly rated lawyer is both honorable and unexpected by the public, and it shows that detailed post-graduate education is required to be able to handle this problem.
Ron Denman was drawn into the recognition of this problem because he thought wrongly that it would be simple to bring a father, Oliver Bivins, home from Florida to Texas to live with his son, but was stopped by the actions of a Court that was on the side of a guardian that a jury later decided was abusing the father.
Ron Denman is shaken by the experience and is doing his best even though he and his firm won their multi-year jury trial against the guardians.
Law School is not equipping either lawyers or para-professional assistants, or students in how this dysfunction is being perpetrated upon elders and their families.
The best defense for your family is specific education and sharpening your awareness of how the rules of the system are being treated by the arrogant “elder care” people that are trying to throw their weight around and push their way into your family’s right to improve your parent’s senior lifestyle.
“Forewarned is forearmed” so that your family are not victims of this thriving racket that festers in the elder’s services arena.
Most families are unaware of just how often they will actually be stripped of their rights, and watch as their parent’s rights are also stripped from them – when the family put themselves in a position of being judged by so many of the everyday elder care workers that have “given up” on standing against the greedy professional people that want control of a vulnerable elder’s savings and property.
Western Filial Piety is the sacrosanct tradition of providing care for your parents that cared for you as a child.
Until there is a national priority outcry about the values of Filial Piety, and there is substantial action to treat the elders as cherished national treasures that are sacredly protected like our Bald Eagle, your family is in the position of self-defense.
Any naive lawyer that thinks that the constructive application of Justice is anything less than basic family values, is not being sensible. Basic Justice is part of evolving our society and is not “zealous” or “worthy of disrespect”.
There are many museum projects to preserve precious elder memories for posterity.
The National WWII Museum, The Holocaust Museum, The public history projects run by museums for Native Americans, are some of the many projects that understand the priceless value and experiences of elders that carry irreplaceable memories from the 20th Century culture – memories that millennials will need to reference, to navigate the future cultural and personal challenges that our elders have similarly faced and conquered in their past experiences, and that they can share with us.
Your family can defeat the jaded people – whose power is in your ignorance about their well-worn racket.
Start today by getting stronger and taking actions to immunize your family with alliances and education against this practical threat that is happening every day in and around the Courts.
Oversight Review Boards with National scope, staffed with non-lawyer citizens, reviewing guardians’ activity, is a sensible proactive newer movement whose time has come to be expanded beyond the more limited successful model pioneered by the State of Maine Board of Overseers of the Bar, Indiana’s Adult Guardianship State Task Force, as well as WINGS, Working Interdisciplinary Networks of Guardianship Stakeholders.
Well known professionals are joining to serve their fellow community families by dedicating a few hours a month to Guardianship Board Review duties.
Dr. Sam Sugar has now outlined and structured INAGRAB Independent National Adult Guardianship Review Advisory Board as a Tribunal.
Contact us to discuss how your skills can help to change and transform the disgrace our culture is facing; and elevate our standing in the world in comparison to other countries that are truly raising the quality of life for all.
So that we can be proud among other nations in showcasing how our national elder treasures are being honored.